Friday, July 15, 2011

Walmart

Dear kind people of Walmart,
Are you aware that due to your low low prices you may encounter some families in your store? Families that have multiple children? Have you told your employees this?!!!

I am tired of other people parenting my children. I know I am not the worlds' greatest mom, but I discipline/parent my children plenty. They are actually very well behaved out in public. Today after several hours at Peter Piper Pizza playing games and not having a very good lunch (Cooper, Brenton and Blakeleigh). I think pizza is a perfectly acceptable lunch for my children, but Coop, Brenton and Blakes decided they did not need to eat any of it...So after PPP, games, and a stubbed bloody toe for Cooper, I decided to venture into Walmart. Mind you it was a quick trip and my kids were fantastically behaved. After I unloaded my cart I was all smiles when the grouchy cashier asked if I wanted to buy the salad in my cart. You mean the half eaten, semi-wilted salad that I saved from Peter Piper Pizza? I believe I will keep that thank you. Enter dirty look from cashier. As she was beeping my items, Caiden proceeded to take a seat on the bagging area. He was not in anyone's way, but the cashier told him sternly to "get off" and also told Cooper who had sat down before Caiden was yelled at. I didn't know quite what to say, so I just opted for a look of death at the Cashier. What is appropriate? "Please don't yell at my kids you mean lady?" or "give me a break you mean lady" or just "you're a mean lady"? Probably none of those, so I'm sorry I gave you a dirty look mean lady. Meanwhile the cashier in the other lane said "you have 4 kids?! you deserve a star, better yet a medal!" Yes, yes I do...for shopping in your store, for waiting an hour and a half for a cashier who is more concerned about germs (wearing gloves) than she is about checking my groceries out, for watching my kids melt down because it has taken me so long to shop because you rearrange your store every other week, for having to load my own groceries and then forgetting some because you forgot to turn the turntable thingy, then as I walk out with bags under my eyes and screaming kids-being asked for my receipt as if I could have possibly had enough forethought to have stolen something.
Instead of giving kids a smiley face sticker as they walk in Walmart, I want a t-shirt that says "I survived my trip to Walmart in spite of..." You fill in the blanks.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

"The Office"

Once a week, I allow myself a delicious, indulgent Starbucks drink. So if you see me on Tuesday, I am generally very happy and SUPER awake!! Usually I drive through on my way somewhere, but this Tuesday we were staying at home all day so I decided to go quickly to my neighborhood Starbucks in the morning while Zeb watched the kids. I was in such a good mood that I ordered Zeb a hot chocolate and the kids each a "special milk". This consists of milk with a pump of vanilla (chocolate for Cooper) and ice in a cool cup with a straw. Six drinks later I was walking out the door when a lady said "you must be buying for the office". I had to laugh because I was wearing a cover-up with my bright pink bathing suit under it. Swimming lessons were next on our morning agenda. Where exactly did she think I worked? I told her the drinks were for my kids and then clarified that they were milk in case she thought I was feeding them mochas or something (that has NEVER happened before and if any of my friends or mother fess up- we are fighting!).
The comment about the office got me thinking. I WAS buying drinks for the"office". I work from home. I am not self-employed however. I work for God, my kids and my husband. I generally work for the salary of hugs, kisses, thank-you's and the occasional break to Target by myself. My office has an awesome dress code. Apparently I can wear my bathing suit all day if I want. Casual Fridays are any day of the week. My office never closes, we are always open for business. Especially in the middle of the night if some little body needs snuggling or comforting. I have a never-ending task list for my clients and myself. It is the hardest job I have ever had (keep in mind I used to work the 12 hour night shift with peds bone marrow patients). It is the best job I have ever had! Watching my kids grow not only in height and weight, but spiritual maturity and social maturity...looking on as they read and color and play games. Nothing better in the world. What a fantastic job opportunity I happened upon. I hope they never fire me.
One last question-do you think the people at Starbucks give office discounts?

Monday, May 9, 2011

Snakes and other gross things

I'm willing to admit we live in a world that contains snakes. I even pretend I'm not totally terrified of them when they are in pictures in books or on the t.v. Let me tell you however, that when I actually see them in real life-in my neighborhood-NEXT TO MY HOUSE-I'm not so cool with that. Such was the case on Sunday when I suggested we take our two crazy pups and our four slightly less crazy children on a little stoll down the block. Our dogs haven't been on a walk before, so I thought this would be good practice. First off Lucy bolts out the door of the garage super-excited to go on a walk. Laynie doesn't make it past the steps because she thinks we are taking a car ride. She is apparently not fond of the car. We are on our little stroll with the same theme of Lucy running this way and that-smelling everything, running in circles getting the kids caught up in her leash and Laynie is sitting in the middle of the road refusing to walk. Fun times.
My neighbor drives by and casually tells us she has just run over (with her car) a rattlesnake across the street from my house. Neat! Good old Zeb gets in our car and re-runs the snake over to make sure it is dead. I later ran in over in my car just for good measure. So that was our exciting trip outside. Once we get inside we decide to go downstairs and play. In the process Blakeleigh wants to take her diaper off and pee-pee in the potty. Don't get excited yet mom-we are nowhere near potty trained (mainly because I don't want to deal with it). The little munchkin continues to walk around half clothed, no diaper while we are reading some stories in Brenton's room. All of a sudden, Zeb looks at me and says "don't move...". Keep in mind we used to have a major scorpion problem in our old house and have now seen two rattlesnakes near our house. I don't know WHAT I thought was behind me, but I'm pretty sure I shoved both Brenton and Blakeleigh out of the way to climb onto the bunk bed. Zeb starts laughing and I turn around to see what I risked my children's life in lieu of my own safety for. Apparently a pile of little girl pee and a large poop was the culprit. Good to know that in an emergency, apparently I am NOT the person you want to be with!

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Dogs on a Diet

Well let me tell you...I bet our community veterinarian wishes we would find another community. When her (very nice and friendly by the way) office staff sees 2 adults, 4 small children and 2 puppies who don't want to stay on their leashes come into the office...I'm not exactly sure what they are thinking. Maybe something like, "why does the whole stinkin family have to come EVERY time" or "you'd think they would train those dogs to sit still"(which they have been taught to do-apparently it just works in the living room) or maybe, "don't their dogs know they need to pee outside?".
Well last Saturday, the whole Delp crew barged into the vets office. I went in first with Laynie (our lab), followed by Brenton and Caiden. Out the window I see poor Zeb trying to get Cooper and Blakeleigh out of the car followed by Lucy (our golden) on her leash. Lucy does not want to go inside and is trying to eat the bushes by the front entrance. Inside we are trying to get Laynie on the scale while poor Caiden is in tears because his allergies are bothering him so much. I head Caiden off to the bathroom while putting Laynie up on the scale. She now weighs 28 lbs (a 14 lb weight gain from 4 weeks ago). At this point, Zeb, the other kids and Lucy finally make their way into the door. Lucy and Laynie start wrestling and tangle each other up in their leashes. My kids are all shouting commands to the dogs ("sit, stay, Lucy!! Laynie!!). The well-behaved dogs are not listening at all. We get Lucy up on the scale (27.5 lbs-a 12 lb weight gain in 4 weeks), our name gets called and Laynie pees on the floor. Keep in mind this is all within 5 minutes of us being there. I have a feeling our vet's office is so efficient because they want people like us to get the heck out of there as fast as we can!

Anyway, not only have we paid for the dogs, dog beds, leashes, collars, dog toys, dog food and several vet visits. Now my vet tells me the dogs are looking a little overweight and maybe I should purchase a special dog dish with curved insides so that it derails them from eating too fast. Are we kidding? Do you mean I'm NOT supposed to be filling the dog dish and throwing it from the door out into the backyard? I don't know why I was so insulted when she said the dogs were chubby, but I was. I try to defend myself and tell her the dogs are VERY active out in the backyard. At which point Laynie lays herself down on the floor and falls asleep. As we leave the office I notice that Blakeleigh has ripped out several pages of a magazine, Brenton has bonked his head on the exam table numerous times, Caiden is still crying because at this point his eyes are almost swollen shut and Cooper is using his famous "inside voice" (shouting to the rest of the world). You know, we Delps like to do things as a family and create a show wherever we go. Rest assured, the dogs are now on a diet and I think they are angry. Oh, and the vet also said Laynie is coming down with a skin infection and we should give her a bath more often. Maybe I'll just put the dogs and the kids in the shower together and call it a day!

Friday, April 29, 2011

updates

Did you think we fell off the face of the earth? I can't believe I haven't written in almost a year. What happened? Well, for starters we rented our house and moved into a new one!! Hooray for us! More living space, more backyard space, more playing space. This has equaled more work for Zeb and I. I'm sure I am echoing the sentiment of most moms when I say that I can't keep up with the laundry, dishes, homework and activities of my kids. I find myself saying to my kids-"mommy only has one set of arms and hands, please be patient". To which they reply "I wish you were an octopus". That would work out great since 3 out of the 4 of you don't like to swim. So, once we got our house organized we decided we were bored apparently and got ourselves some dogs. Not just one puppy, but two! They are very cute and sweet little dogs. We are happy Blakeleigh is not having a stroke anymore when they look at her and Brenton is not acting as if he is on some sort of spy mission (dashing from his post on the couch to retrieve his shoes in fear one of the dogs might see him). Now we are dealing with the pee and piles of poop we find in the house-awesome. One day things might calm down, but for now our crazy life continues. I might just have to make this blogging thing a priority because I feel less stressed already. More to come, more to come....

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Little boys

So, summer has officially begun. Caiden and Cooper are now both out of school. Today was our first day home with everyone. The day started with my early riser Brenton who was in my bed giving me a "back rub" (kicking me, kneeing or elbowing me) at 5:30. I'm still not sure what is possessing him to wake up so early, but oh well. Then followed Cooper and Caiden at 6:15 who announced "we slept in today, just like we were supposed to!" At which point I grabbed Zeb's arm and begged him not to leave us to go to work. After Caiden got his fix of TV today-I'm embarassed to say how many hours pbs was on, we started in on an art project. Someone gave me the idea to fill large ziplock bags with all kinds of different, random art supplies and pull them out every few days. I made a big production of getting the art supplies out of the closet, even going so far as calling them our "imagination bags". Caiden and Cooper both chose a bag filled with foam stickers, popsicle sticks, beads and pipe cleaners. I brought out crayons, glue, markers etc.... Brenton chose a bag with paper and stickers. I'm thinking this will last for hours. We could glue foam shapes and beads then draw pictures around them, write a story about them, hang them around the house. What's the first thing the boys do? Well besides Brenton whining about how he needs what the big boys have, Caiden and Cooper make a "wand" out of a popsicle stick and heart or star foam shape. "Do you know what this is mom?" Of course I do-it's a magic wand, we can change things into what we want-new food or drink, change our clothes, make ourselves fly on unicorns or something equally as stupid and girly. "no, mom they're SUPER DEFEATER SWORDS-ching, ching (imagine fighting and slashing and running rapidly around the house). So much for art day. We also set up a cute frog shaped tent that I thought could be a "book nook". It turned into a superhero force field that no one was allowed in. I don't understand boys, but they sure are full of energy and cute. I'd like to say I understood girls. While Blakeleigh has an affinity for baby dolls, she sits here playing with Legos and a Lightening McQueen mechanical pencil in her hand.

Cooper's quote of the day (these quotes are going to turn into a book)-Mom, I don't think God stretches us out at night (as he is pulling his hair up and his arms out), I think he just grows us.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Random happenings at our house

Well, I keep waiting to be "inspired" to write or waiting for something extra funny to happen at our house. Funny things happen all the time, but by the time I get the boys to bed and wait for Blakeleigh (the energizer bunny) to fall asleep, I am WAY to tired to write. So rather than posting about a specific event, here are some random happenings at our house.

* All of the kids played a little game Zeb and I like to call "tag-team vomiting" last weekend. It was really fun running from room to room with old Easter buckets in hand to catch puke. All started by little Typhoid Mary (Blakeleigh) and ended with Cooper. Thank God Zeb and I didn't get sick. I think we got Gran and Papa a little sick however-very sorry!! I am so grateful Zeb is not only a fantastic doctor, husband and father but also a great puke catcher, fast runner and good at doing laundry.

Blakeleigh-she now is cruising really fast around the furniture and even stands by herself (until she notices, then falls on her booty). She can blow kisses and her favorite animal is a pig. We have decided that because she knows how to make the pig noise. She needs to grow some more hair because she can and does pull her hair headbands out. She is sleeping better at night and after her brothers go to bed can stay up and entertain us for quite awhile. We love to hear her talk and say "mama, dada, lala". Lots of fun!

Cooper-Just finished his last day of 3/4 year old preschool! They had a teddy bear picnic to which Cooper brought his dragon named "dragon fire". Daddy and Cooper and Caiden had a special night at Build-a-Bear and made dragons-very cute. The teddy bear picnic was fun except for Cooper had a serious attitude problem. He wouldn't smile for pictures with his teachers and just wanted to go home! He is ready for summer! I have to get him started on some activites at the house or he is just going to fight with Brenton or bother Blakeleigh all day!
Favorite quote by Cooper -(while going to the bathroom)"Dad can you press that button that makes it not smell so bad?" "The fan, Cooper?" "Yes" "Dad, it still stinks in here" "Well, Cooper, that's because you are sitting in your poop"

Caiden-Just finished playing coach-pitch baseball. One of his coaches is a fireman, so we got a tour of the firestation. They are still talking about it. His last three days of school are this week! He has had the most amazing kindergarten teachers. I can't believe all he has learned. He is reading, doing math, spelling, writing, can tie his shoes. He can ride a two wheeled bike and is actually remembering and enjoying swimming! Such a big boy. Still likes to snuggle with mom and dad and be read to or hear stories about when he was "little". He will be moving out of our sunday school class this summer into the FIRST GRADE class-I don't know what we will do without him-we have been teaching his class since he was 3.

Brenton-the early riser who is always in our bed at 5 a.m. He just finished BSF, where he loved his teachers. This was his "school" when Caiden and Cooper would talk about their school. A switch turned on around 2 1/2 where Brenton only talks in a whiny voice. We are hoping this will turn off when he turns 3. He will be doing swimming lessons as well this summer. All I can say is good luck Miss Margaret!! His new favorite thing is to yell "applise!" (surprise) at random times.

Last, but not least I would just like to say I feel I have been a good sport about the scorpions. Yes, I scream, panic and sweat (or call my mom for moral support) when I have to smash them. Zeb is thinking "when do YOU have to smash them?". But for the record, scorpions crawling on your leg while you are IN BED is not okay!! I would post a picture, but my hero of a husband smashed it to bits-thank you honey.
Pictures to come soon.